I don't want to die doing something stupid. I'm not willing to bet on those chances because I make lots of ridiculous decisions, but I don't want one to identify me posthumously.
I also don't want to die from ALS, but I feel less in control of that.
So I wore my helmet today when we skied out to the glacier. Being on the lake and in the caves is a risk since all this stuff is moving and conditions can change in the blink of an eye. But that risk feels comparable to eating potato chips. Yes, it may kill me, but it brings me enough joy that I'm willing to take the risk.
The wind was blowing on the lake.
I should say howling, and it was also cracking.
The thin layer of ice on top of the snow and on the cliffs was breaking apart and whipping across the lake like sideways buzz saws.
It was slightly terrifying to have thin sheets of ice rocketing through the air towards my head. There was a moment I stopped and savored the horrific Indiana Jones' experience of sharp objects trying to decapitate me.
I'm not sure a helmet would help in that situation, but at least I made an attempt to be safe.
Maybe that's how I feel through all this pandemic stuff too. I want to attempt to be safe. I know there are tons of hypocrisies in what many of us are doing. I try to be faithful about wearing my mask, but also not digging the mask I wear from beneath my car seat or out of the trash. I fail and I forget, but I don't lie to myself about risks or belittle and chastise others. I figure out my comfort and willingness to risk, I try not to do anything that would endanger others, and I wear my helmet when sharp ice sheets are hurtling towards my head.
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