Happy

My grandma read two books to me when I was little until they were falling apart. One was about Raggedy Ann and Andy on a scary ride with a dragon where they helped each other and the other was The Ugly Duckling. I think Tweetie Bird was thrown in there, but I enjoyed it mainly because of my lisp. 

Those stories shaped me. I had a sense growing up that when I was scared, holding the hand of someone I love would make me braver. The images of Raggedy Ann and Andy holding each other up are still engrained in my head and not in a creepy doll kind of way.

Part of me probably loved The Ugly Duckling because I wanted to grow up and be graceful and lovely. 

But I like to imagine the story is not about hoping someday you'll stop being ugly. I like to imagine it's being surprised by beauty and not dismissing what we consider ugly. 

In college I ventured into readings by a whole host of authors. Dostoevsky will always be my favorite who captured the complicated nature of love and grace in the messiness of life and family. 

I also met Ayn Rand and Marquis de Sade.

I put them in the same category and I wince when reading them, but I find their way of telling the story of life is pervasive.

If you are unfamiliar with their names, you are not unfamiliar with their philosophies. 
Happiness is ideal, it is the work of the imagination - Marquis de Sade
Achievement of your happiness is the only moral purpose of your life - Ayn Rand

There are bits of wisdom to be found in both so I won't decry all they ever wrote, but their glorification of individual happiness led them both to a justification if not admiration of rape and humiliation of others. They both abhorred religion, God, and mystery.

I find the idolization of happiness showing up in all kinds of different places and it makes me uneasy. 

Life is not all about having fun and being happy. 

That's not the story I'm going to buy into, especially if my individual happiness comes at the cost of someone else's. 

The story I do buy into is the eternal power of love especially as witnessed in the death and resurrection of Jesus. And I've seen enough crucifixion images to know fun was not involved. 

Love brings our greatest depth of joy and pain, but it is what lives past death. It is definitely not always fun, especially if it involves children who leave junk all over the house or chickens who poop all over the porch, but it makes life rich and abundant. 

There are lots of stories we're asked to embrace and I think it's helpful to be aware of which ones you're telling yourself and the kids around you.