Robot

I think I might be a robot; it's impossible for me to pass the verification things to prove I'm not a robot so I must be one. 

There should be an automatic pass when you don't complete the clicking on squares for more than a minute because obviously you're trying to find your glasses so you can identify all the crosswalks, cars, and storefronts in the pictures. 

Or you should get an automatic pass when you fail finding all the stupid buses more than four times. Do they mean a tiny part of a bus or does it have to be an entire bus?

Sometimes I overthink things, but it is all making me pause before I click the "I am not a robot" box. Shouldn't there be another choice, like "I am a middle aged woman who can't see or figure out how to verify my identity, but you can probably hear me swearing so that should be enough" or maybe a button saying "I might be having an identity crisis and starting to think I'm a robot".

I'm now on a mission to prove I'm not a robot. Here is my plan:

1. Make more irrational choices. I think I need a few more of these to protect myself from the systematic processing of a robot so I do things that are uncomfortable and don't have a good reward. Today I went for a long hike in the pouring rain without my raincoat. No robot would do that, even though it wasn't a choice as much as I just forgot my coat. I'm pretty sure having water drip down my back into my underwear could be a verification test to prove I'm not a robot. 


2. See the world without a utilitarian agenda. People and things do not exist for me to use for my personal agenda. They are not steps in my program to get me to the final result. Every being has an integrity on its own; I do not get to control or manipulate others for my machinations. I get to hang out in the mystery of being without pretending I'm in charge.

3. Take time to laugh and cry. Our ability to experience joy and pain will always set us apart from machines. Even if machines could figure out how to laugh or cry at appropriate moments, I would still have them beat because I do these things at inappropriate times, just ask anyone who has watched a movie with me. 

We are not robots, consumers, work units, tax payers, electors, or plebeians (that's just too fun of a word to pass up). We are unique mysteries or as my faith tradition states, "we are beloved children of God." Maybe that could be a box to check at the end.