Hungry

I think I'm normal and then I suddenly rub my head against a strange man's chest. It seemed like the obvious solution to my problem until I looked at the reaction on his face and realized I might have chosen poorly.

So there I am hungry and eating ribs with sauce all over my fingers and the no-see-ums eating my brain, what else could I do?

It was maddening and I didn't want to put the ribs down and he happened to be standing behind me so I used his chest as a scratching post. I apologized once I realized this might have invaded his boundaries and he said it was fine as long as it wasn't lice. Hmm. I just spent the week with over 100 kids hugging and loving on them so I'm going to do a lice check right now.

You'll be happy to know I am lice free; hope that makes you feel better stranger man. 

I also just spent way too long talking about my chickens to the nice man who sells bike helmets in New York. I might even have held the phone up to chickens so he could hear them chatter. 

I think the hard thing for me is I feel really awkward around strangers so my solution is to dig into an intimate relationship immediately. I'm not sure that's overly healthy and I'm far better than I used to be, but still when I show up somewhere new I tend to overshare and ask way too many personal questions.

This is why I love summer lunch and having kids hang out all summer. 

They do the same thing. 

They overshare and ask way too many questions.

Here's a typical day: I sit in the grass while one kid on my right is telling me about his dead brother and the kid on my left is asking a million questions about ants while other kids run up and want me to watch their amazing feats.

One of Jesus' craziest teachings was when he plops a kid down in the middle of an ego battle and says, "Let the little children come to me; do not stop them; for it is to such as these that the kingdom of God belongs."

Kids are not particularly moral or innocent creatures. I hang out with them too much to romanticize them and try to imitate their ethics.

What kids have going for them that we often lose as we age is their ability to show up hungry and needy without being embarrassed about it. 

The things that unite all the kids who show up at noon at the church are:

1. They show up

2. They are hungry (for food, play, connection, a break from home, something that feels real)

I know that doesn't excuse my strange behavior, but if being faithful has something to do with showing up and being hungry then I'm in pretty decent shape.